You’ve brainwashed the head of Organisation Management’s wife. You realise that, don’t you? You’ve made her speak fluent philosophy. Surely that wasn’t your intention.
Turns out the head of Organisation Management’s wife has a gift for philosophy. She gone from nought to a hundred all at once. She’s gone full philosopher.
I’m the head of Organisational Management’s mad wife. I’m the wife who can’t be trusted with a full time job. I’m the head of Organisational Management’s philosophical wife. I’m half mad, which means I’m half philosophical …
My madness, my special madness, which should be named after me. Which I’m … pioneering. For which I’m flying the flag. I think it’s a very philosophical madness …
I’m terribly seductive, which is part of my … problem. My mental disease.
I become delusional and spread my delusion. I become compelling. I cast a spell. And the one I’m who goes mad, too. And my poor husband has to pick … up … the … pieces.
Do you want to go mad, philosopher? Do you have a high tolerance for madness?
Be careful, philosopher. My head’s more open than yours. Something’s wrong with my neuro-circuitry. And you’re only encouraging me. You’re giving me license to be more mad.
I’m ahead of all you philosophers, that’s the thing. Because I’m already there where you want to be. I think things you want to think. Easily. Like, it’s second nature to me.
I’m mad and getting madder. It’s incurable. I’m every kind of delusional. I’ll have to be locked up, you realise that, don’t you.
I’ll spend my lifetime locked up after doing some crazy thing. Like murdering my lover. Like stabbing him. I could do something terrible. Are you afraid of me, philosopher? You should be.
I have these thoughts … these feelings that are too big to contain. And I think about God … constantly. As mad people are said to think about God.
You’ll have to help me. I disappearing into this Moment. This Moment is swallowing me up. This interval. This gap. That’s where I’m going to be lost: in this … gap
And you’ll have to help me. Pull me out. Or maybe God will help me. Maybe I’m God’s beloved. Maybe God loves me and knows me. Maybe God’s going to use me for something, maybe. Maybe I’m God’s tool. I’ll be happy to be that.
Don’t think you’re the first one I’ve spoken to like this, philosopher. You’re not the first one I fell for … You’re not the first person to tell me I’m beautiful. That word: beauty. That beautiful word, beauty. It’s almost ass beautiful as the word, God. And of course they mean the same thing.
I’ll bet you feel sorry for my husband now. What he has to put with. From his mad wife. From her madness.
Until I do something really terrible and get locked up. Which could happen, philosopher.
Are you afraid? You should be. I’m … unpredictable. I can’t predict myself. I don’t know what I’m going to do.
Am I sweeping you up in my delusions? Only a philosopher could understand my delusions. Appreciate them. As you would a fantastic work of art. Or as a pseudo-philosophical system. Because I’m sure you find me pseudo-philosophical, philosopher.
You’re stepping back from me, philosopher. You need to. You’re watching me … perform. Because that’s what I’m doing.
Am I mad? My sanity’s mad, unlike yours. My sanity’s disturbed.
What if I were to say that I’m mad, utterly so. That I’ve lost it. What if I were to say that I barely hold it together … Or that the way I hold it together is itself mad. That my organisation and my management are both mad. That I have a direct access to chaos. What about that?
My afternoon madness. Which can only be expressed here. By the way I speak – with you. By the way I am – with you. And are you mad, too?
I’ve been possessed. I’ve been invaded.
I don’t use that word lightly: madness. It’s not a word among others. I have a direct access to it. If I open my mind widely enough, I‘ll be … engulfed.
Do you ever feel that? Do you ever hear voices?
No – do you?
I think I speak in voices. I say things not my own. Of which I’m not the origin. What do I say, philosopher? What do I know?
Do you think I’m saying these things just to sound interesting?
All this philosophy … We’ve worn philosophy out. Just say the word to yourself: philosophy … just say it. Just repeat the word. Go on … Philosophy, philosophy, philosophy.
I know more about philosophy than you do. I’m more attuned to philosophy. I belong in philosophy. It’s all mine. Don’t you see?
Why did the head of Organisation Management marry little ol’ me? Of course, he wasn’t head then. Why did he marry a wild card?
See, he loves chaos. For the same reason that he welcomed philosophy into his School. He’s a masochist. He likes things a little out of his control. Which is why he likes you. He told me he likes you. It’s official. He thinks you’re a good guy. He doesn’t understand you, but he likes that, too.
Work in Progress 