Philosophy Departmental meeting.
What’s supposed to be today? What’s supposed to happen today? What are the plans?
Whose plans?
Our plans.
Fuck our plans. Our plans never get us anywhere.
What’s the next item on the agenda? What’s the most anti Board of Studies thing we can think of?
God. Let’s talk about God.
You start.
Is Antarctica on the agenda?
Why should Antarctica be on the agenda. I want to know what’s been happening there. I have a lot of questions about Antarctica.
You’re no allowed to fly over it, you know. Or go there.
Dave Lee Roth went there. Slept out on the ice, next to the penguins. Said they kept him awake. He’s a great traveller. Motley Crue wanted to play a gig there. I don’t think they did, though.
Did you see that Werner Herzog film about Antarctica. With the penguin? I liked that bit: the penguin just wandering off on its own, in the opposite direction to the sea. Off into the heart of the frozen continent.
Shut up about Antarctica. We need to get back to the agenda. There are things to discuss!
How about pyramids – are they on the agenda? There are pyramids in Antarctica, you know. And on Mars. What does it all mean?
And I think we should have the Sphinx on the agenda. How old is it, really? Does it really show signs of rain erosion?
As Chair of Board of Studies, I forbid any discussion about the Sphinx at this meetings.
Or pyramids?
Fuck pyramids.
And Gopekle Tepe?
I forbid the discussion of Gopekle Tepe.
So what are we going to discuss?
I think we should use the occasion to have group.
Group what?
Therapy. I think we have deep, deep issues. Especially you.
Philosophical issues? Personal issues?
Personal issues are philosophical issues. The personal is philosophical.
You mean political.
I mean philosophical.
More mead?
Fuck off with your mead.
Did you buy the whole collection? Are there different flavours, or something?
They come in pairs.
Like a brace of meads?
Shut up about meads. I don’t want to discuss mead. Don't minute anything about mead, Fiver.
Work in Progress 