Abominations

This is not our Earth. It was not made or us. It’s not ours, nor can it be. It’s not for us.

We’re supposed to hate it. We’re supposed to hate this.

This is not our world. If we don’t know it as filth, then … If we don’t hate it – all of it – in every detail, then …

 

It’s absolutely wrong, this world. It’s what we should not want. It must be what we cannot want. We must not want this. We must hate it.

Filth: that’s what we must see in it – all of it. There must be no day that passes without hatred.

 

This is not our world: we must know that. We must be nothing other than this knowledge. Which should be heavy in us. Which should crush us.

 

We cannot let ourselves succeed in this world. Success in this world is filth.

 

There is nothing divine about the world. it’s the opposite of the divine. It’s hatred. Which must mean self-hatred.

 

The Creation is not a creation. It’s an … abortion. This world in its entirety, is ruled by Satan. It’s Satan’s world, or God’s world.

 

See through it all. See through the illusions. She beyond this world. There is nothing you want here.

 

The devastation: begin from that. The damnation. The horror: remember that. World horror.

 

You have to live in opposition to this. You have to live against it. Failure is success. Stupidity is brilliance. Death is life. Despair is joy.

 

There is a sickness. There is a poison. There are falsehoods. And deliberate lies.

 

You have to say, I can no longer live like this. I can’t live this life. You have to say, I’m disgusted by this life. And by myself, living this life.

You have to say, This is not life. This is not what life should be. You have to say, This is not how I should live.

 

You have to say, This is poison. There is poison everywhere. You have to reach absolute despair. You have to reach a perfect despair.

 

You have to know despair as too much. As stifling. As strangulation. It’s truth – to be strangled by this world. it’s how things are.

 

You have to say I want to throw up all the poison. I want it out of me. Out of my bloodstream. You have to say, They poisoned me and I want the poison out. And the go on poisoning us. Poison rains down from the sky.

 

I don’t want to hear that the world is good. That there are good things in the world. I don’t want to hear that not everything is wicked. And corrupt. I don’t want to hear that it isn’t all poisoned.

We have to live against this. We have to leave this. This is not our world.

 

Abominations: that’s what we’ve been made to become. But abomination: is all I see around us. I see what should not be. I see what should be hated. I see foul growth. And multiplication. I see the spreading of disease. I see the different forms of poison.

 

I think what disgusts me about me is about the world. The world in me.

And sometimes I think to myself: we will never die. And I don’t know what that means.

 

Anything good and pure and innocent must be perverted. Must be twisted.

 

Abomination: is the most terrifying word. But it is the right word. We are in Hell. This is already Hell.