Vocation

Philosophy: how did that word fall to us? Under what circumstances could we call ourselves philosophers?

Philosophy as a name for desire, that’s all. Philosophy as a calling, that’s all. Philosophy a vocation and nothing besides. As a question.

The question of philosophy. The question as philosophy. Our question? The question that asks us. In our stupidity. In our lack. In everything that disqualifies us as philosophers.


The fact that we can do nothing else. The fact that we don’t want to do anything else. That we’ll just stand there, open-mouthed, in the clearing of philosophy. Waiting. Looking upwards. As for some alien abduction.


We hold the philosophical line – but what line? We keep the philosophical faith – but what faith? We stay at our philosophical posts – but what posts? What are we doing? What are we for? Are we awaiting orders? Waiting to be relieved?


Some alert has sounded. Some klaxon. Some warning about us.

We found our way in. To where we shouldn’t be. Not our kind.

But don’t we preserve it more strongly than anyone, philosophy. Don’t we keep its space open, philosophy? Even if our philosophy has no content at all. Even if it’s just questioning. Even if it is for nothing. Even if it’s always in vain.


An empty command, that’s what we’re heeding. A vocation that is simply a revocation of everything else.

What are we waiting for? What do we think Is going to happen? But the waiting’s the thing.

Just delusion. Just misprisions. Just befuddlement. And bewitchment. Just delusion. Just persiflage. Just error. Just mistakes, and mistakes upon mistakes. But philosophy nonetheless. The philosophical question.


There should be warnings about us. Rewards for our capture. Wanted posters. There should be bounty hunters tracking us down even now. Bloodhounds on our trail. They should be following our footprints.

We should be stopped, shouldn’t we? There should be prevention orders. keep away orders! Restraining orders! Non molestation orders! Legal warnings of all kinds. To prevent our criminal trespass! Our civil trespass! There should be security measures! Surveillance measures!


There’s something wrong with us, just as there’s something right with us. There’s something stupid about us, just as there’s a desire to be something other than stupid.

We’re of the earth, the clay, just as we’re of the spirit that hovers above the earth. We’re atheist, desperately so, just as we’re the most fervent believers. We’re philistines – terrible philistines – but don’t we love like no one else the great European culture that is out of our reach.

Philosophers entirely in lieu of philosophy. Entirely lacking anything that would make us philosophical. Philosophy minus philosophy – but still philosophy. Philosophy, hollowed out – but still retaining the desire that is nothing other than philosophy.


The philosophical hollowing. The philosophical abyss. In which nothing remains but the cry of philosophy. But the question of philosophy.


That word, philosophy. What it means to us. That word … that seemed to summon us. To call us to it. That word … which we’ve whispered to ourselves in times of desperation. That word … naming something for which we’d live and die.